State Champion

Nornor's team won the state championship yesterday in chess, despite a very turbulant weekend he had to experience.

Chess can be a very lonely and individualistic sport. But sometimes the pressure of team commitment and responsibility can be extremely high too.

天生辩才

nornor学校组织the big backyard walk, 讨论水的三种状态。
一家长给每个小朋友发了一个试管， 问：“if you fill the test tube with snow， close the cap really tight, and leave it in your locker for the morning, what will happen by the time you check on it again at noon?"
小朋友们纷纷举手：“it will melt!" “the snow will turn into water!"
“Right,"这家长接着问：“will the tube be as full? why?"
又有几个小朋友举手：“it will be less full, because the snow melted into water."
终于轮到nornor回答，他说：“The tube will be less full because when water changes states, from solid snow to liquid, the volumn changes. The test tube was packed with snow. In room temperature, snow melts into liquid water. Volumn reduces and the tube becomes less full. But that is not the complete answer. It also matters that the cap is closed tightly so the water does not evaporate into gas. The higher the temperature is, the more likely the water evaporates into gas and gas takes more volumn........."
那位家长只好举手叫停。

nornro想在学校的international night表演karate, 为此他特意跑去游说他的教练Sensai Jill 想让教练带队参加。
教练一翻自己的calendar, 那天她正好已经订了飞机票去佛罗里达看自己的妈妈。
于是就有了以下对话：
Jill：“I am so sorry, but I am going to Florida on that day to see my mom."
nornor:"So, you are going to Florida on exactly the same day?"
Jill:"yes."
nornor :"Have you aleady booked your ticket?"
Jill:"yes."
nornor:"And I guess you are not going to change your ticket either?"
Jill:"no. can't change it."
nornor:"are you going alone?"
Jill:"Yes, myself, to see my mom."
nornor:"Why can't Sensai Kevin lead the team to my school then?!"
(Sensai Kevin比sensai Jill的段级还高，但平时不教nornor这个班。”
"Why can't Sensai Kevin lead the team to your school then?!" Jill不由得重复了一遍nornor的问题，又跑过来给我描述了这段对话， 说：“he got me."

我在ymca的停车场停车的时候，看到一中国人就紧紧地停在楼门口的通道上，挡住了大家的出入，忍不住愤慨地说：“中国人呀，就是不讲公德！老是在不让停车的地方乱停车！”
说完紧接着也反省到自己的恶行：“不过我也做坏事，经常紧急停在残疾人的车位让你下车."
结果nornor在后座不紧不慢地说：“妈妈，you did nothing wrong, nothing illegal. It says no parking, but it did not say no pausing. You paused, but you did not park. Pausing is not parking. They may both start with a P. They may also sound alike. But there is a huge difference between the two. I can spend the following hours to tell all the differences........"

OMG, 我仿佛看到一颗未来的律师明星在我面前冉冉升起， 所有臭名昭著，劣迹累累的tricks:
1. get the facts straight
2. argue the nuances
3. play with the language
4. seek alternatives
.......

三提馒头

昨天开学第一天，我对学生们说
"I love teaching. It is the most rewarding job I can think of. Just look at you, and look at me. I am standing here with so many eyes sparkling on me. I see your aspiration。 I see your sincerity. I see your eagerness to learn. I bestow to the huge responsibilities and trust. What else can you do to have such direct impact on others? I am humbled by this privilige I have right here with you."
学生们面无表情，我自己被自己感动得一片哽咽。

然后刚才开车在路上，一群幼儿园的小朋友手拉手过马路。白雪皑皑，阳光灿烂，两侧的车辆顺次停下，静静地等着每一个孩子走过。我又热泪盈眶。

讨吃技巧

（1）皮要厚
周末去吃早茶。
运运没吃几口就急于脱身，
拉着我到前台转悠。
一遍一遍地问：“我吃点什么呢？我吃点什么呢？我吃点什么呢？！。。。。。”
冰雪如我， 当然心知肚明：以前去的餐馆，每次走的时候都给一个棒棒糖！
狡猾如我，当然明知故问：“你想吃什么呢?"
这家餐馆没把棒棒糖摆出来。
运运转来转去没看到糖的踪影，只好再来推我：“你问问他们有什么？“
“他们有饭，有菜，你是吃饭呢还是吃菜呢？“愚妈我继续问。
“你问问他们有没有糖。”云云终于直抒胸臆。
“我不问。”我做脸皮薄状。
运运只好自己上前，出动她的chineglish:"你们有lollipop?" (语调英式：一个巨大的上升问号。）
餐馆的人估计只听懂了lollipop这一个词，但足够了。
人家翻箱倒柜，从台子底下找出来年代可疑的几颗糖。
nornor小声对我说：“不知道这糖坏了没有。”
运运才不会问这种问题呢，赶快接过来，两下剥掉纸含在嘴里， 满眼的幸福。

（2）心要黑
吃饭的时候，得使劲劝运运多吃菜："运运，看，有胡罗卜！“
运运说：“小白兔吃胡罗卜。”
我说：“对呀，小白兔，白友白，爱吃罗卜爱吃菜，蹦蹦跳跳真可爱。”
“我不爱吃罗卜，”运运大声宣布，“我爱吃小白兔！”
说完，还豪气地放声大笑。

（3）啊弥陀佛
上飞机之前，我未雨愁谬地告诉运运：“我们在飞机上不买东西吃，太贵了。好吗？“
运运说：“oh, man!" 算是答应了。
结果飞机起飞没多久，乘务人员就开始推着小车吆喝了。：S
“妈妈，”运运说， “飞机上有吃的东西。”
（tnnd, 我当然知道）
“乖，我们不买。 是要钱的。“
“你有钱吗， 妈妈？”
“妈妈没钱。“（a white lie.)
"爸爸，爸爸，你有钱吗？”
“有。怎么了？“
“妈妈，爸爸有钱！有钱就可以买吃的了！”
nnd, 我使劲瞪了lg一眼，“好人都让你当了！“
lg给运运买了一包chip, 说：“运运， 还是爸爸好吧。”
运运边吃边点点头说：“啊弥陀佛！”
(谢天谢地谢佛祖呀！）